why is everything keep changing? it is so constant. god I'm off track. I don't even know what I'm doing with myself. people who you thought won't ever leave your side, left - eventually. yes, I know how they say "people come and go" yada yada yada and you move the fuck on but common, I'm just another human being you know. I have feelings. I don't get over people in a second, especially the ones that left good memories in my life. the one I consider family. how the fuck am I gonna move on. you think it's easy? definately not. I act like nothing's up with my life. like it's soooo perfect, every morning showing myself up in school with a wide smile on my face when really, it's fake. who would notice that though? NOBODY. untill today, nobody realised, my morning-happy-overexcited smile is somehow, faked. yes, I'm forced to smile, stand tall, chin up, and to ignore everything that will put me down, but deep down? do you even know what I'm going through? NO. you don't. exactly.
I've been saying this so many times now and it keeps going on and on, yeah I know, but don't blame me, that it's so hard to erase you from my memory. you were everything to me. we were so close. we were like sonny & cher. bonnie & clyde got nothing on us. we were better than Aladdin & Jasmine. we were inseparable. we were two people that count as one. you meant everything in the world to me but since you left, without saying anything, what have I got left? just another chaos in this fucking life.
personally, I'm not ready to let you go. I'm never ready. but I guess if that's what you wished for, congratulations. you got your wish. I'll no longer bother you. have a good life without
